This Is How You Become a Leader: And Why People Say They Are Not...

Leadership Isn’t a Title—It’s a Practice

The other day, I was in a meeting with someone the other day, and something they said really stuck with me. We were discussing leadership styles and I asked about their leadership perspective and approach. They said, "Oh no, I'm not a leader, that is our manager."

I need to pause here for the sadness, anger, and lack of development that company has for their employees.

It was such a small moment. A throwaway line. But it spoke volumes. Someone said they aren't a leader because to them leadership is associated with a title of manager. Let's be clear LEADER IS NOT SYNONYMOUS TO MANAGER. Lots of managers are leaders and lots of leaders are not managers.

As a leader, you lead people. As a manager, you manage tasks and projects and things. YOU DO NOT MANAGE PEOPLE. This is the death of leadership if managers believe they manage people.

Here’s the thing: leadership isn’t reserved for the person with the title, the corner office, or the bigger paycheck. Leadership is a mindset. It’s something that can be cultivated, practiced, and demonstrated—regardless of your role or rank. Leadership asks us to choose our attitude, to choose our actions, and to choose to show up for others in a supportive and compassionate way.

Yes, that person technically reported to someone who had “manager” in their title. But leadership isn’t about hierarchy. It’s about influence. It's about impact. And it's about taking ownership—of your work, your behavior, your attitude, and your relationships with others. And if that company is letting people think leadership = manager, then that company is hiring and breeding poor leadership (or at least that department...).

Everyone Has the Capacity to Lead and This is How You Become a Leader

One of the biggest misconceptions we have in the workplace (and honestly, in life) is that only certain people are cut out to be leaders. The truth is, we all have the potential. Every single one of us. Leadership doesn’t start with a promotion—it starts with a decision. A choice to show up with integrity, to support others, to solve problems, to take initiative, and to make things better wherever you are.

Leadership looks like:

• Taking responsibility for a mistake without shifting blame

• Encouraging a colleague who’s having a rough day

• Volunteering for a project that no one else wants to touch

• Speaking up when something doesn’t feel right

• Asking “how can I help?” instead of “what’s in it for me?”

Those are the actions that build trust, influence, and respect—building blocks of leadership. Notice how it didn't say 'manager of ___' or title anywhere on that partial list..?

You Don’t Become a Leader Overnight

It’s also important to say: leadership takes time. It’s not something that happens just because someone hands you a title. It’s something you grow into. And like anything else, it requires humility and a willingness to learn.

Just think of a ferris wheel, it goes around and around, people get on and off, you climb and see the beautiful views and then you come down and it's concrete roads. Leading is the same way. There are moments that are beautiful and scenic and others that are rough and tough and require A LOT of grace, compassion, and choosing gratitude. The beauty of it all, this becomes the wonderful world we live in called the circle of life (leadership).

Leadership is like a ferris wheel, you go up and you go down with different views along the way.

In fact, the best leaders I know are also the best learners. They’re not above anyone. They actively listen. They are generally the last people to speak in a room. Why? They love to hear others' collaborative comments first. They serve. They’re willing to get in the trenches with their team. They lead not from a place of power, but from a place of service, and this is truly how you become a leader.

Because that’s the paradox of leadership: if you want to lead, you must first learn to serve.

Servant Leadership Is Real Leadership

This isn’t just philosophy—it’s a practice. True leadership means putting the needs of the team before your own ego. It means showing up consistently, doing the hard work, and lifting others as you climb.

So if you’re ever tempted to say, “I’m not a leader,” I’d challenge you to pause and rethink that. You may not have the title, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have the power to lead.

Because at the end of the day, leadership is less about the org chart—and more about how you choose to show up.

Let's rise!

xx

Nani